Wings
by Elaira
Summary: Follows the manga up to Chapter 82. Sohma Rin is a mysterious girl; she fights the curse alone to protect others. But is she really alone? What if...somebody from her past has returned, and is prepared to go a thousand miles with her, to fight the curse?
1. Encounter

Wings

**Disclaimer: i don't own Fruit Basket. All the information in this fanfic is collected on the Web. If you want credit for your works, e-mail me. **

**Note: This fanfic follows the manga up to Chapter 82. Major Spoilers. Sohma Rin is the horse in the 12 Zodiacs. **

**Chapter 1 – The Meeting**

Honda Tohru walked down the pavement of the city. It was in the afternoon and most people were either at work or at home, hiding from the scorching sun.

She took out a folded paper from her pocket and re-read the map again.

"Eto...that bookshop should be a bit farther down, nee..." She mumbled to herself.

The jingle of the bell distracted my attention. I pull my eyes away from the book to the front door. A girl with long hair came in. That was all I could see by the sun behind her that shone into this shadowy shop. Refreshing, after all these darkness...

I shrugged. I could hear the shopkeeper making small talk with the newcomer. I shut one of my ear to their conversation and returned to my book.

"Anou...do you have any books on curses?" The voice was high and tentative; a friendly person, judging by the voice.

"Curses? Of course! It's on the New Age section." She leaned over the counter and pointed to the spot where I was standing. "It's just on those shelves there!"

Distracted again, I lifted my head to stare.

The girl had big brown eyes (a bit too wide, in my opinion) and black hair. She cocked her head when I stared at her, and something stirred in her eyes.

Coming back to my analysis by the voice, she pretty much fitted the friendly personality.

The girl thanked the shopkeeper and walked over to where I stood. I went back to my book.

Hmm....I skimmed the chapter's section...ahh..curses...

I flipped to the page and read:

It's very difficult to determine if someone has cursed you unless they openly tell you so or you find physical evidence of it. But whether someone has is not the crux of the issue. What matters is whether you are allowing a curse to work on yourself.

The power of a curse doesn't come from external sources. We curse ourselves, through self-defeating thoughts, feelings, and behavior. By telling ourselves we don't deserve pleasurable things, we're powerless in bad situations, we have bad luck nonstop, etc. Those negative feelings manifest into our actions and we end up sabotaging happy situations and creating unhappy ones. Most of the time we're not aware when we're doing this.

Exploring those self-defeating feelings within ourselves brings to light how a curse was successful. Deal with those feelings and you'll be rid of the curse. Then it won't make any difference if someone tries to curse you. Curses "work" through belief in them.

I stopped at that paragraph. Interesting...

_The power of curse doesn't come from external sources. We curse ourselves, through self-defeating thoughts, feelings and behavior. _

...Like feelings of uselessness....I sniff quietly. But for the Jyunishi, those self-defeating thoughts are probably from Akito...

Sudden movement at the corner of my eye. Looking up, the girl before was reaching for a book on the higher shelf. The petite fingers were inches from the target; yet, it couldn't seem to stretch any further.

I strode next to her and reached up. I easily got it.

"Eh? Ah!" She franticlly bowed as she accepted the book. "Arigatou gozaimasu!"

"Ie, it's nothing," I smiled faintly.

She flashed me a smile as sunny as the sun.

" All About Curse ", I caught the title of the book in her hands. My eyes slightly widen.

"Are you interested in curses then?" I asked, mildly curious. She didn't look the type that might curse anyone who offended her...

"Eh? I'm just...a bit of interested in them..." She began hestitatly.

Deciding not to probe anymore, I smiled and went back to my original spot.

It is human nature to blame someone else for our misfortune, rather than to see what actions we took that may have led us to the place we are. It's easier to believe someone or something "out there" is causing our trials and tribulations. This, however, is not taking responsibility for your own actions and attitudes, it's deciding that someone else has control over your life.

If you feel you are cursed, the best magickal thing to do is regularly practice a grounding or centering exercise. There is a grounding exercise **here** from my BOS. The **LBRP** (Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram) is highly recommended for those with a ceremonial bent.

_I don't understand. I don't understand at all_.

_Not taking responsibility for your own actions and attitudes, it's deciding that someone else has control over your life. Huh??_

My eyes hurt. It had been totally overworked over the books I had read. Guess I should call it a day?

I pushed the book back and walked to the shopkeeper.

"Izumi-san, I'll be leaving now," My frequent visits to this bookshop had attracted the shopkeeper's attention. We exchanged a few things over the counter.

"Ah! Not buying anything today, Sohma-chan? Very well then! Ja na!" There was a tone of disappointment in her voice.

"Ee...ja!" Guilty as I felt, I walked out.

The tinkle of the bell above my ear was the last thing I heard when I spotted a girl racing across the street.

Dressed in body-fitting leather shirts and short pants, long dark hair flowed with the girl's insistence urgency.

She seems to have a knack for tight fitting garments..

My eyes widen in shock. She's already out of the hospital?

Quick as she had come, Sohma Rin had disappeared.

"Sohma-san!"

Startled, I reared around to find myself knocking into the opening door. I cried out and my hands automatically went to shield my eyes. I stumbled back a few steps.

A searing pain filled the spot above my left eye.


	2. Chapter 2 Sohma Yuri

Chapter 2 – Sohma Yuri

"Ahh! GOMEN NASAI!!" A voice cried out.

I opened my right eye, squinting between my cupped hands and flowing hair. Ouch... The edge of the door had knocked the spot above my left eye. It throbbed painfully.

I raise my head a little. The girl in the bookshop was clasping her hands in front of her mouth, a look of absolute horror on her face.

She reached out a hand for me.

"GOMEN NASAI!! GOMEN NASAI!! I DIDN'T MEAN TO—"

"Ie," I mumbled, taking my hands away. I blinked my eyes a few times, the skin throbbing rythematiclly.

"Daijoubu, watashi was daijoubu des, " I assured her.

"Ie! There's a bruise coming up!" She pointed to my eye, frantic again.

"Ah? It'll go down in a few days." Gingerly touching the spot (it felt sticky), I smiled reassuringly at her. If any, she seemed even excited about it than me.

"Anou," she said when I turned to leave. "Sumimasen! But, it seems to be bleeding now. Would you like to come over to our-er!- house to dress it?" Brown eyes showed concern.

Eh? Bleeding? I blinked and reached up. Sure enough, a sticky substance stuck to my fingers.

I started to deny. This was nothing. Chasing Rin was more important.

"Honda-san!"

"Eh?" We both turned, surprised.

Sohma Yuki stood there in school uniform, his bag sling over his right shoulder. A look of equal surprise painted his face.

"Eh? Sohma-kun! Has the Student Council finished then?" The Honda girl exclaimed.

"Aa," Yuki said, nodding to her. He stepped forward and turned his questioning gaze to me.

"..Yuri-san? Are you back from the boarding school at Hokkaido?"

"Ee. It's the summer holidays. It's been a long time, Yuki-kun. I heard you left the Main House." I replied politely.

"Eh? Sohma-kun, you know her?" Honda-san asks.

"Ee," Yuki nodded. Dimly, I wondered how he knew this girl. "This is Sohma Yuri, Rin's twin sister.


	3. A Fateful Swim

Chapter 3 A Fateful Swim

"Okasan, otosan, we're going out for a swim today! We'll be back before dinner, neh?" Young Yuri exclaims ethuastisly, practically bounching up and down. I stayed by her side, excited too.

"Ah! You girls had better take care of yourselves." Mother nagged, a basket of laundry in her hands. She frowned.

"But I really think—" she seem to have some doubts about the trip.

"Maah! Okasan, we'll come back safely. There's nothing to worry about!" She pouted , her plump arms on her hips, glaring up at Mother.

"...Oh well, I guess it won't matter then," She sighed, and walked out of the living room. "Have a nice swim, and take care of yourselves!" Her voice was slightly muffled.

"Yay!!" She jumped up and took my hand. Together we went out of the front door and the car was already there, waiting for us. We were going to the Sohma House Resort for a swim.

"EEEE, the water is so cold!! Hahahaha!!" Yuri screamed when she jumped into the water. She visibly cringed and started to move around in the water.

The cold water sent a shock over my body. It was cold.

"Look out!" I splashed a wave of cold water over her head. She screamed and swam back. When the water cleared, I couldn't see her. Then a hand grabbed my tighs. Tickled, I kicked franticly at whoever was under the water, yelling. Yuri's wet head descended above the water, laughing mightily.

We played like that for a while, until I got bored and suggested we play another game.

"Ok, how about we have a match? Neh, to the end there," She pointed to the opposite end of the lake. "Whoever reaches there first wins."

"Hai," I agreed.

"Ok, so one, two, three, GO!!" She shouted.

We both dived and swam.

At first my muscles were slow, because I hadn't exercise in a while. During the times when I surfaced to take breaths, Yuri was always behind me. Soon my muscles were more flexible and I could swim faster. I didn't look back again, as I was already nearing the edge of the pool.

My hand reached the slippery tile of the pool floor first. I won! I turn to look at Yuri, who was no where to be seen. I climbed out of the pool for a better view.

Yuri's body was floating face down the surface, motionless.

I screamed in shock and quickly dive into the water again, swimming to her. I grasped her by her waist and pulled her along with me to the edge of the pool. I had difficulty hauling her up, but finally I managed to do so.

I stood numbly, not knowing what to do at first. Then I ran to the door that leaded to the receptionist counter. The expression on my face must have told them what happened because the words were hardly out of my mouth when they rushed to where I came.

One of the receptionist, who was a woman, preformed the emergency rescue on her. The other pumped Yuri's chest. I watched it all in a daze; my head felt light and I thought my vision was getting darker.

Finally, she coughed and spit out some water. The receptionists breathed a sigh of relief. My emotions were in turmoil. I didn't know whether to cry or laugh. In the end, I just said: "We better get home. Okasan will be worried." after she recovered. Yuri only nodded and followed me out of the pool. I thanked the receptionist for their help.

On the journey back home I told Yuri what happened. She was visibly impressed when I told her that I rescued her from the pool. I flushed a bit and pretended not to notice it. If any, I was sure that my good deed today would impress Mother and once again forgive me. Then the we would once again be the happy family we once were. I felt excited just thinking of it.

But things didn't go so well as I had expected. Instead of praising me for my deed, Mother went hysterical.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU LOOK AFTER YOUR SISTER, ISUZU!!( Rin's original name. Rin is a nickname created by Shigure. Isuzu means "bell")" she screamed. "SHE COULD HAVE DIED! DO YOU KNOW THAT!! WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE CARE OF HER!? CAN'T YOU BE A SISTER AND TAKE UP SOME RESPONSIBILITY FOR ONCE??"

I cringed; both outwardly and inwardly and lowered my head. Father heard the commotion and came out too. After hearing what happened, a screaming battle ensured again. Father backed Mother up and screamed at me. Tears were flowing down my cheeks now and I sobbed silently. I started to think that it wasn't such a good deed after all...

...why did you agree to the race? If you didn't she wouldn't have nearly drowned...why do I always do the wrong thing and make them angry?... I raise my hands to my face and wept.

"Allright, that's enough. From now on, you are grounded. Go to your room now. There will be no dinner for you tonight." Mother said quietly, so quiet that I sank even further into despair. I had never been grounded before...

On my way up, I caught a glimpse of Yuri. She had a look of absolute shock and fear on her face. She stared after me wordlessly.

Once the door closed, I climbed onto my bed and sobbed, holding a pillow to muffle my sound.

* * *

Somebody was knocking on my door. I fell asleep; I got up groggily and opened the door.

Yuri came in hurriedly; as if she was hiding something. I caught a nice smell when she passed me; my stomach churned in response. She was bringing food.

She crossed my room and sat on my bed. Then she extended both of her arms and my dinner was there, packed clumsily into my lunchbox. I looked at it, then looked at Yuri. We weren't suppose to bring food into the bedroom.

"Neh, this is your dinner." She smiled up at me. I stare dumbfondly back.

"Okasan and Otosan are so scary just now. I was thinking that they would praise you for rescuing me." She continued , dark eyes lowering. "Demo, I know it's not your fault." Dark eyes lifted up to mine. "Arigatou neh, for saving my life today."

I stood rooted to the ground. Yuri complained that her hand was aching and I quickly took the lunchbox form her.

"Neh, eat it up. You deserve it more than I do," she looked at me. Feeling awakard, I told her that I would eat later, even though my stomach opposed strongly to it.

Since we shared a room, Yuri lingered there for a while, playing with her dolls before going downstairs. I attacked my dinner like a hungry wolf once the door closed.

That night, when Okasan came to tuck us in, she ignored me. After tucking Yuri in, she left the room whithout glancing at me. Despair filled me again.

A rustle; I felt my covers being pulled up at my left. Yuri snuggled up beside me. She then gave a light kiss on the cheek, like what Mother would have done while tucking us in.

"Neh, Suzu-neechan, don't be sad. You got tucked in tonight also," she giggled softly. Soon after that she was silent, sleeping peacefully beside me.

That night I had a dream. In that dream, Okasan and Otosan were smiling and forgiving me, and we were one big happy family. Then it was broken by a kick in the face; Yuri was mumbling and her limbs were everywhere. I snuggled farther form her and soon fell into another dream. The next day when I woke up, Yuri was already on her bed, snoring slightly. No doubt she had gone back to her spacious and comfy bed. Even so, I felt a fuzzy feeling in my heart and smiled faintly.


	4. Unexpected Reunion

Chapter 4 Unexpected Reunion

"EEEE???" the girl cries, excited.

"Hajimemashite! Watashi was Honda Tohru des!"

"Aa, hajimemashite!" Honda Tohru? Ah, now I remember! Kagura mentioned in her letters...the girl who knew the Sohma family secret...

"...Sumimasen, Sohma-san? Anou...you really do look like Rin.." She smiled up at me.

"Aa, arigatou neh," I heard that countless of times before. In fact, that was one of the reasons Kaa-san sent me to boarding school. We looked so alike people often mistook us for each other.

"Ja, shall we go home then?" I noticed his gaze was directed at Honda-san. I felt the sinking feeling of being left out in my stomach, like a total stranger in their midst...wait...I _am_ a stranger...

Maybe I could use that as an excuse to decline her offer...to chase after Rin...

"Hai! Shall we go then?" She turned to me, features expecting.

I blinked; beside me, Yuki did the same. Obviously he did not expect this. She did not seem to have forgotten her offer just now then...I mentally sighed. But still a part of me wanted to decline the offer and chased Rin...

"Neh, your bleeding, Yuri-san," Yuki pointed to my eye. Once again, it proved to be the centre of attention, I thought sarcastically.

"Maybe you should come with us. It'll leave a scar if you don't tend it properly." He said calmly, giving a small smile.

Honda-san, if even, beamed even wider and repeated her offer.

"Neh, shall we go then?"

With the two of them, I couldn't turn down their offer this time.

Honda-san told me the whole thing during our journey home. I chuckled silently to myself when I heard the part how she had knocked Yuri-san with the door.

Aah, Honda-san can be a bit clumsy at times...I cupped my hands to my mouth as giggles broke out, remembering the time when Honda-san had missed the ball during a ping-pong match with Kyo.

"Tadaima, Shigure-san!" Honda-san opened the gate and announced. Shigure looked up from his newspapers, his spectacles giving him a somewhat grown-up look.

"Ah, Okaerinasai, Honda-san, Yuki-kun—" he stopped, spotting Yuri-san behind me. His eyes widened slightly with surprise, but his fake warmth immediately sprang into action.

"Aah, Yuri-san, you're back! So soon!" He cried ethuasiclly. I stepped coolly past Yuri-san and went upstairs to my room to change. Honda-san disappeared into the kitchen with the promise of a First Aid kit. That is, if she could find it in the endless depths of the Sohma cupboards that were filled with goodness-knows-what. I snorted.

Looks like she found it, I observed when I came down.

Yuri-san was sitting on the seat beside Shigure-san, who had taken back his fake warmth and was now reading his newspapers again.

I took my place opposite of Yuri-san and watched.

They chatted while Honda-san expertly dressed the wound. Honda-san would never cease to surprise me, I smiled.

"Sou da ne," Yuri-san agreed to something Shigure said. Suddenly she paused and looked out of the window.

"Shigure-san..." she said.

"Hm?"

"...how is Rin's condition now?"

Everybody paused in their work. I look at Yuri-san. Honda-san who was in the middle of closing the kit stopped and looked at Yuri-san. Shigure was blinked, then laughed.

"Ya ah!" He scratched his head. "You _are _her sister after all. So you heard what happened? According to Ha-chan, she was out of hospital a few days ago."

An awkward silence ensured. I said nothing but stared at my hands on the table. Rin was at the Sohma House Resort too. She was hiding and threatened Honda-san and me not to tell anyone else.

"Sou..." she said slowly.

"...and I wonder _who_ spilled the beans about Rin and Hatsuharu's relationship..." she finished softly.

Nobody spoke after those few words. I tensed in my seat, realizing the hidden meaning in her words.

Honda-san stared blankly at us, as if we all had started speaking gibberish.

Shigure dropped his funny stance and regarded Yuri-san. Her eyes never left their position on the window. The air was tense in the room.

"Saa..." Shigure scratched his head again, closing his eyes.

"...who knows?"

Yuri-san turned and narrowed her eyes at Shigure.

Minutes of tensed silence dragged on. Honda-san was frozen in her posture, brown eyes wide and questioning.

Yuri-san looked out of the window again.

A rumbling broke the web of silence in the room. The sound was coming from Shigure's stomach.

Shigure blinked before bursting out giggling. He patted his stomach and addressed Honda-san, who jerked free from her posture.

"Tohru-kun," he smiled widely. "Would you mind making dinner? It may seem rude but my stomach insists on it." He patted his stomach again and scolded: "Bad stomach! Bad stomach!"

I sweatdropped. Trust Shigure to break the mood.

Well, at least the tension is broken. Honda-san flustered at Shigure's words and bounded off to the kitchen. Shigure picked up his newspapers again and began to read, ignoring Yuri-san, who had not move at all.

There was nothing I could do. Just as I was about to get up to the kitchen to assist Honda-san, Yuri-san said: "Is there a bathroom here?" and stood up. Her expression seemed somewhat shocked, which brought me to think that she might have regretted her last words.

Shigure looked up for a moment.

"Yuri-chan!!" he suddenly exclaimed, puppy eyes wide and teary. "How _could_ you!!"

Stunned by the sudden change in expression, she blinked and uttered out: "Huh?"

"How could you think we do not have a bathroom!!??" He pouted. Yuri arched an eyebrow and was about to say something when he continued.

"Do you we live in the Stone Age?? Where people do their business on banana leaves!!??" he exclaimed in mock horror. I snorted.

Yuri seem to be at a lost of words. Shigure decided to take advantage of it.

"Maah," he put a finger to his chin. "I guess living in the Stone Age wouldn't be that bad." His brow furrowed in concentration, which was obviously faked. "Hmmm....imagine Yuki-kun running around with only leaves to cover—"

I immediately towered over Shigure menacingly, who suddenly had shrinked to the size of an ant. Purple eyes glinting, a vein twitched in my forehead.

"I'm sure Yuri-san would appreciate you answering her question without any nonsense," I said coldly. Shigure sniff and turn to Yuri-san.

"The left after the front door," sobbed Shigure.

Yuri turned was out of the room in a flash. Judging by her movements, she seem to be in a hurry. Woman's problems??

Sighing, I got up to the kitchen.

I raced out of Shigure's house only to find myself in front a maze of bushes and trails. Right...the living room window was on the right side of door...where I had seen Rin...

I turned right and ran into the forest. Branches and leaves scraped my face occasionally; I brushed them away impatiently and trudged on. I followed the outline of the house and reached the living room in no time. Dodging behind some high-grown bushes I crawled on all fours to pass by unnoticed. I reached a tree and peeped out from it. Yuki-kun was asking Shigure-san something. Honda-san was presumably in the kitchen making lunch. Good. They hadn't notice me.

I slip away from the tree and continued on again. If I wasn't mistaken, Rin ran _this_ way when I saw her at the window...I made my way through the tangles of massive tree roots. She couldn't have gone far...even if she _was_ the Horse in the 12 Zodiac...

Soon, I came to a clearing. Grass covered most of the place, with a pile of flat rocks at the end of it. Tall trees edged around the grass-covered clearing.

I gasped softly. Rin, her raven black hair billowing in the wind, was sitting on one of the flat rocks. Her back was turned to me.

I advanced forward. I had only taken a few steps when Rin noticed my presence. She swiveled her head and intense black eyes narrowed. She didn't moved. I continue forward.

I stopped a few paces before her.

"...What do you want?" After all these years without talking, Rin shot the question at me.

"I came back to see you." I stated simply.


	5. Innocent Information

Chapter 5 Innocent Information

It was night. A lantern stood at the corner of Sohma Akito's room, casting it's drowned light onto the floor. Shadows danced as Akito walked in front of the few Jyunishis, who were visibly nervous to be summoned by Akito the first time. All were quiet in the room.

Rin was nevous; but it was lighter compared to the others. She could hear Yuri's encouragement when the summon first came that morning: It's okay! You'll be okay! I won't let him hurt you! a confident smile on her face as she said that. Rin remember smiling in gratitude at her twin sister.

Akito continue to pace in front them, doing so deliberately. It worked; out of the corner of her eye a few of the younger Jyunishi were already fidgeting and looking at the floor. Others pretended not to be affected by it by sitting motionless. Yuri's comforting voice stayed in her head, offering an anchor against the raging waves that threatened to swept her away.

Akito stopped; he turned to face the few Jyunishis on the floor. Although not much taller than them, he loomed menacingly above them. Seemingly satisfied, he addressed each of them.

"...do you know who I am?" Though soft, his voice carried across the room, sending a shiver up Rin's spine. She gulped and a bead of sweat trickled down her cheek.

"Hai," the Jyunishi answered, not at once, but each of them answered.

Akito smiled.

"Na, this is the first time we have meet. I'm pleased to meet you all," he smiled even wider.

"...I hope we'll get along well. I expect you all to follow my instructions. You know why, don't you?" he paused. A murmur of agreement rose from the Jyunishi.

Rin grimaced. Her heart felt as if something was sqeezing it, and she felt goosebumps all over her body. Her throat suddenly felt dry. Swallowing, she wiped her sweaty hands on her clothes.

Fear. She hadn't felt so afraid since that time when Okasan had screamed at her. She was afraid.

She was afraid of Akito.

Yuri's voice didn't come to her mind anymore. Yuri wasn't here. This was Akito.

"..Neh, let's talk about other things then. Since this is our first meeting, let's introduce ourselves." He surveyed the heads before him. A particular raven black head caught his attention. Nothing changed in his expression, but it seemed as if his eyes shone even maliciously.

"Sohma Isuzu, darou?" he quietly said.

Rin's head raised a fraction; Akito was calling her! "Hai," she answered.

"...ie," Akito tipped his head slightly, observing the girl with raven-black hair, so black it shone with the weak light given by the lantern in the corner. So similar... "..Rin? The nickname given by Shigure..." His eyes narrowed ever so slightly. "...What a nice name.."

Rin slowly nodded her head in acknowledgment.

As the rest of the Jyunishi watched in bated breaths, Akito padded towards Rin, who was paralysed by fear. He crouched down in front of her.

"Look at me," he quietly commanded.

Rin lifted her eyes to Akito's cold one.

"You hair is very soft, Rin...very soft and silky..." Akito's right hand was caressing her hair, slowly and softly.

Akito was praising her?? Relieved, she started to relax in his rythmatic caressing.

"Neh, Rin...are you happy living with your family?" he asked, not stopping in his ministration.

"Ee, I'm very happy." Sensing no reaction from him, she decided to be bolder. After all, Akito seem to like her.

"I'm very happy at home. All the other Jyunishi seem very sad," she glanced at the others beside her.

"...Go on," he encouraged.

Rin's opinion of Akito was changing. He wasn't as fierce as they say, she thought.

"We're a big, happy family at home. Although Okasan and Otosan are sometimes quite fierce and scold people, but Yuri is always there for me." She beamed.

If he was taken back, Akito didn't show it. Instead, he asked : "Who's Yuri?"

"She's my twin sister. She is a very kind person and cares a lot for me." She answered innocently.

Akito suddenly stopped and stood up. All the heads that were raised in curiousity lowered hastily again. Fear gripped Rin; did she say anything wrong?

But before she could say anything, Akito's voice droned.

"I'm very happy today. Meeting you all had been a pleasure. I think this is an end for tonight. I will summon you next time." His eyes closed up into half-moons in his smile.

"I love you all the most," his voice sounded in the silent room, echoing.

"How did it go, Akito?"

That night, snuggled in the warmth of the blankets and Shigure's arms, Akito grinned.

"Sohma Rin...she resembles somebody, doesn't she?" he asked.

"Eh?..." Shigure sounded surprised at first. Then he grunted.

"What are you going to do then?"

Akito paused a while before continuing.

"...It's a secret, Shigure-san..." Akito silently smiled into the blankets.

Minutes later the sound of soft snoring told Shigure that Akito was asleep.

Thank you all for reviewing my story, especially Haru and Kisa Lover!! ;)

I like Akito actually; he has that kind of soft voice that somehow calms me and makes me wanna go to sleep. Though I don't think I'll feel that way if I was one of the Jyunishi. ;) In episode 13, there's a scene where young Akito (a few years older than Yuki) beats Yuki-kun in a room. The reason Akito was so interested was because Rin resembles Akito's mother (appears in the manga) Ren. i think Akito hates her(Ren).


	6. Akito

Chapter 6 Akito

Thanks for the tip!

"Eh?" Yuri gasped at her parents. "Akito-san has requested a private meeting with me??" she repeated in disbelief.

Rin who was eating breakfast at the table looked up in surprise.

"Hai," her mother said worriedly. "The servant came in just now to deliver the message." She frowned. "I wonder what could be the problem. Yuri, did you do anything—"

She shook her head. Okasan "hmm" and was silent. Otosan shrugged and went out of the room.

"Well, nothing we can do but to send her there, then,"

"Darling, don't you think we should—" Okasan began.

Rin left her seat and stood beside Yuri. Wide eyes stare up at her. She smiled reassuringly.

"Daijoubu neh," she repeated the words. "You'll be alright, Yuri-neechan."

It'll be alright, she thought to herself. Akito-sama seems to like me, so he won't do anything to Yuri...

But strangely, that thought didn't comfort her at all.

* * *

"Neh, do you know who I am, Yuri-chan?"

Yuri gulped visibly and answered. "Yes."

Akito smiled his cold smile.

"I talked with your sister yesterday. She told me so much things about you. You were so kind in her view, I couldn't help but feel a bit jealous, you know," he chuckled mirthlessly. His shoulders shooked , causing his loosely worn outer kimono to fall down to his elbows.

"She was such a good girl..." he continued. "Neh, are you a good girl?" Akito's eyes traveled to the open window, which was providing the only source of light in the dark room.

"...Hai," Not knowing if she was or wasn't, she thought it would be better to presume herself so.

The resounding sound of flesh hitting flesh rang through the room.

Yuri fell sideways down onto the hard wooden floor. Her locks of the same black hair her twin sister possessed covered most of her face, hiding the wide, glassy eyes beneath. Her cheek was stinging where Akito had slapped her just now.

A sound in front of her; turning quickly, she scrambled away from him. A hand shot out and caught her chin, holding her in place.

Akito's eyes were almost wide, pupils dilated.

"How dare you agree to that?" he said softly. "You ruined my plan and meddled in my business??" his voice rose.

Yuri cringed. _What was he talking about?_ The first tears fell down her cheek.

"Why do you always have to help your sister? Are you that kind? Or do you want to challenge me then?" _Slap!_ A sound like a whip being cracked. Yuri gasped and started to sob.

"Why do you have to be so annoyingly helpful to your sister? She got what she deserved." Akito laughed. Then he pulled her face close to his own. Purple eyes contradicted with his deathly pale face; making him a living ghost.

"She belongs to me." He hissed in her face. "_All_ of them. They must follow my instructions. If I want them to cry, they must cry. If I want them to be happy, they must be happy. Don't you try to meddle in my business by helping or comforting them, _brat_." He spitted out the last word and shoved her away. Yuri fell backwards with a cry.

Akito stood up, ignoring the sobbing girl.

"I think the meeting will end now." He glanced in the direction of the shoji doors. Smirking, he faced the crouching girl.

"Remember, they all belong to me. They will do what I tell them to do." He stepped forward and grabbed her face.

"You'll be a good girl for once, won't you?" He whispered. "You'll be a good girl and stop meddling in my business, won't you?" Frightened eyes said everything, but Akito wanted to hear it himself.

_Slap!_ "_Answer_ me!" he screamed.

"HAI!" Yuri shrieked, wrenching away from his grasp. She lay at the floor, knees folded and sobbed. The heart-wrenching sound did nothing to soften his heart. With a final smirk, he exited through the shoji doors.

"Yowai..." he muttered under his breath. He noticed his kimono had fallen down and pale hands came up to re-tidy it.

"Yowai nee..." he muttered again, smirking even wider.

Yuri stayed in the room until her sobs subsided. Slanted ray of light crossed her tear-streaked face as she lay motionless.

_You'll be a good girl and stop meddling in my business, won't you?_

* * *

My mother sent me to a boarding in Hokkaido after that. I followed Akito's instructions and stopped being helpful to her. Rin was shocked and hurt at first, but gradually she ignored me. I left for Hokkaido when I was 12 years old, without a goodbye to her. It's been 5 years since I spoke to Rin. I obtained occasional information from Kagura, after she left Okasan and Otosan and stayed with them.

All this time I thought about Akito's warning. I was a coward and I knew it; a coward who couldn't even defend her own sister.

Until the day Akito pushed Rin out of the window. I was horrified. When I calmed down, I thought of all these years where I had hid. Hiding from Akito. Even though I wasn't a Jyunishi, he had the power to push me into doing what he wanted.

I felt angry. Akito had gone too far. It didn't matter that they had a bond; everyone had their right to make their own decisions. They weren't Akito's puppets. They were human beings. I couldn't believe that it took 5 years for me to notice. Baka Yuri.

I wrote a letter to Okasan. I wanted to come back. She protested but I insisted. They were making the arrangements now. I would not be at Hokkaido for the first term.

I'm coming back, Rin.

Yowai : weak

Baka : stupid


	7. Rejection

Chapter 7 Rejection 

"I came back to see you, Rin."

There we were; two teenage girls in the middle of a clearing, surrounded by forests. A slight breeze picked up now and again, stirring both of our identical black hair around us.

Rin looked back at me without expression. Her lack of expression ruffled me; though that was to be expected. This was just her attitude.

My palms were sweating. I racked my brain for some suitable words; anything that would make a conversation. Guess I needed to improve my communication skills, especially if I was talking to Rin here.

"…Rin…daijoubu des ka?...I mean…I heard what happened…" I fling my hands as I tried to continued, failing so miserably.

I sighed and finally said, "Are you really okay?"

Rin had broken off eye contact in the middle of the conversation. She gazed at the forest beyond, and said nothing, her face a stony mask. I looked at the ground and studied the rocks.

It dragged on for a few seconds.

"…what do you think you're trying to do?"

"Eh?" My head snapped back to Rin, her intense dark eyes narrowed at me.

"What do you think you're trying to do? After all these years of silence, you're coming back to see me? Is it because about _that_? Why are you controlling me anyway?! You have no right to!" she hissed venomously.

Taken back, I couldn't find anything to say. I didn't know she was so quick to temper…But then, time could change people. It would be better to go straight to the point then.

"Rin…" I stammered. "I did came back because of that…but…that was only half the reason." I stopped here, not knowing how to continue. I did not want to say anything that might anger her again; not that her anger had subsided.

"Rin…I know I haven't been a good sister for you all these years…but I realize now…and…I hope that—"

"—hope that I would give you a second chance??" She laughed.

I faltered. Rin stood up, the same height as me, her hair circling around her aura-like as she spat the words out.

I thought I would never forget the words she said for the rest of my life.

"_Fuck off_! Why should you have a second chance?? And stop trying to act like a caring sister in front of me; it disgusts me. Why the caring act all the sudden? Do you pity me then?? Because you live such a happy life that you pity me and want to make my life better?!" She almost screamed.

"Fuck off," she spat again as she advanced forward. I stepped back a step. Her pupils dilated, and she added in a lower tone. "Go comfort other people's life. Don't mess with mine. Go back to your warm, _loving_ family and go live your happy life. Leave mine fucking alone." With a swirl of her head, she strode away from me.

Akito's voice sounded through my head. _You'll be a good girl and not meddle in my business, won't you??_ The memory of the smile was cold, merciless. Akito was merciless.

Gazing at her disappearing back with shocked eyes, I swayed. My knees buckled beneath me and I fell to the ground. A moment later my mouth opened into the first sob. Tears flowed freely down. The sound of my wail echoed throughout the clearing.

I should have expected it, I told myself. I was expecting it…and yet, when it hit me full face, I couldn't take it. I couldn't handle it at all.

I couldn't handle the rejection…

* * *

I ran. Once I was sure I was out of sight, I ran like a horse through the forest. 

My face felt wet and my vision was clouded. Branches flew beside me and I ran on, despite the unstable ground.

I never thought she would say that…though I do appreciate her care, I could not afford to allow her to mix with me. Anyone who mixes with me will only regret it.

I snifted and brushed my tears away. I almost tripped over a rock and grabbed on the bark of the nearest tree for support. I took a deep breath.

Haru…somebody cared for me…like you did…I laughed. It was high pitch and wavered uncertainly. I leaned against the tree trunk and slowly slide down to the ground, and sobbed.

Daijoubu des ka : Are you alright?

Note: Rin knows what happen during that day Akito summoned Yuri. She saw the red marks on her face and how pale she was, even though she won't say anything. Anybody in the Sohma House could guess what happened between her and Akito. Yuri does not know this and assumes that Rin is angry with her. Rin and Haru dated for some time, but broke up after Akito pushed her out of the window. Haru is the only person who has cared for Rin.


	8. Fight

Chapter 8 Fight 

"Areh, Sohma-san hasn't come back yet?" A surprise Tohru asked Yuki when she came out holding a pot of her special-made beef stew.

"Ie," he answered and immediately jumped up. "I'll help you take the other dishes, Honda-san," he offered.

"A, arigatou, Yuki-kun," she flushed. He smiled warmly.

"Do you think we should see if she is okay?" she asked to no one in particular, a thoughtful expression on her face.

"It would not be wise to do so, Tohru-kun," Shigure was folding his newspaper and staring at the pot of beef stew longingly. He reached out a spoon to taste and Yuki slapped his hand away.

"No tasting," he said coldly. Shigure put on his glistering puppy eyes, but it had long cease to affect him. It did have an effect on poor Tohru.

"Ee, it doesn't matter, Yuki-kun. As long as you like it—"

"Your cooking are fantastic, Honda-san. I think Shigure knows that already," he assured. He looked at the direction where Yuri went just now. She _was_ a long time in the bathroom. Honda-san was already going into the kitchen ad I followed.

"Anou…Yuki-kun…"

"Hm?"

"…about what Sohma-san was saying just now…what does she mean actually?" She asked hestitately. She flushed and waved her hands at my expression. "EEE!! Gomenasai!! I didn't mean to intrude into your business!! But Sohma-san words were so weird so—" she couldn't go on and blushed even harder.

I put down the plate of dishes I was holding and braced myself on the table. "Ie, you can't blame yourself, Honda-san. Yuri-san's words are weird and always full of hidden meaning. You have to read between the lines." I said.

…_and I wonder _who_ spilled the beans about Rin and Hatsuharu's relationship…_

My eyes narrowed. Even though it had been like this for years, he never gave much thought to it. If you did anything wrong in the eyes of Akito, you'll be summoned to his room. Many could guess what would happen in there. A shiver ran through me as the memories came running back…

I shook my head to clear it. Those are memories, and will forever be memories. Honda-san was looking at me with concern. I smiled and decided to tell her.

"Yuri-san went to boarding school at 12. Something happened between her and Rin that caused that. It was rumoured that Akito had something to do to." I sighed. Honda-san was listening intently to every word. Her serious face was so cute…I thought.

"Rin and Haru dated once. But they broke up now."

"EEEE???" She almost shrieked. I winced at the sound; though I was more or less used to it the same as Shigure's jokes.

"YURI-CHAN!! You're back from the banana-leaf-toilet!!" Shigure's cry sounded even in here. Honda-san stood with an awkward half-smile on her face which could have said, "Eh?" I sweated.

"Saa, we better get the dishes out." I took up two plates.

Honda-san jerked and took some dishes too.

* * *

Honda-san commented on my pale face when i came back. I smiled reassuringly at her, even if I didn't felt like smiling now. Yuki-kun said nothing while Shigure rambled on. They invited me for lunch, but my stomach felt like turning over now at the smell of food. 

I gently declined their invitation, saying I need to be somewhere else. I did need it. I had to get away from all this. None of them protested, and I left with the promise of visiting again. Shigure offered to call a cab for me, but I said I had a handphone and somebody was expecting to pick me up anyway.

Taking out my handphone, I dialed the number of Father's phone.

"Tosan, I'm at Shigure's house now. Can you pick me up?"

* * *

Out in the window of my room, with my arms folded on the ledge, I surveyed the scene before me. Looks like somebody was coming back. I caught sight of the familiar flowing black hair girl coming out of the car. She stood and looked around. Her sweeping gaze passed me, then returned to me abruptly. From here I couldn't see her face very well, but I could see that she had suddenly became very still. 

She hasn't forgotten that day, I smirked. All her visits back here were yearly, and she never once spoke to me. She kept a low profile and stayed out of my way. That was how it should be.

Her father spoke something to her, and she turned and followed him in. She never looked at me.

Laughing, I straightened from my position on the window and walked across the room. The weather today was perfect. It would be a waste to miss it.

* * *

"Saa, Yuri-chan, you're back." 

I froze in my crying. The cold voice was unmistakable.

"Akito-sama…" I whispered, lifting my head up to stare at the dreaded form. He smiled down at me.

"How are you now, Yuri-chan? I trust that you are no longer a naughty girl?" he smirked. At his words my mouth tightened into a thin line. Oddly, instead of the fear that choked me everytime I saw him, irritation crept at the edge of my being.

"…Why so quiet? Cat got your tongue?" he laughed, and his thin form seem to shook with it. I said nothing. Disgust welled up inside me.

Akito is crazy. He's a pitiful sadist who hurts people for his own pleasure, I thought bitterly.

"Gomenasai, Akito-sama. But I think I have other things to do. I will excuse myself now." I stood up. Akito stopped laughing.

"Neh…Yuri-chan…" The soft voice that used to haunt my dreams, even after I went to boarding school stopped me in my tracks.

"You know the ending for naughty girls, don't you? They get punished…their toys get taken away and they're told to go to bed early…" his voice drawled. "Surely…you learn your lesson already? Surely….you haven't forgotten who I am?"

He was threatening me again. But I wasn't a Jyunishi. Akito did not have any control over me at all._ I_ was to decide things for myself. Now, anger won over the stirring fear at the pit of stomach.

"I haven't forgotten, Akito-sama." I said coolly. My temples throbbed slightly, the rage building up.

Akito's laughter sounded in the background as I left the garden.

Behind the shoji doors not far away, a man whose bangs covered half his face closed his eyes.

* * *

The doors behind me shut with a snap as I stood there for a moment, the rage now coursing through my upper being. My head felt crowded with all the emotions now raging. 

"…fucking bastard…you can never leave people's life alone, can't you? Fucking dammit…" Curses of every kind I knew spitted out of my mouth, all centered round Akito. The shoji doors were thin; I had to refrain from screaming it all out.

Minutes passed; my raging emotions gradually subsided and I calmed down. I laughed nervously. Never had I cursed somebody. To curse somebody, especially Akito, was unthinkable. What if somebody found out?

Both my hands came up to cover my face and I lay on the tatami mats, suddenly exhausted. A soft sigh came from my parted lips.

The thudding of footsteps outside my room. My eyes flickered to it briefly before I hastily got up, just as the shoji doors slide open once more. Momiji smiled down at me.

"Yuri-chan!! You're back early this year!!" He shouted joyfully, bounding into my room. I smiled back as he kneeled down before me, enthusiasm evident in his face.

"Hai, Momiji-kun." I wanted to continue, but I didn't know what to say, so I kept quiet. He did not seem to mind and bombard me with his excited talk.

"Nee, Yuri-chan, did you know, we have an outsider who knows our secret!! Her name is Honda Tohru and she is the nicest girl I have ever seen!! Everybody likes her, even Hatori-san!!"

"Oh?" Kagura said she was a nice girl, but I had no idea that she was this popular. My respect for her raised a level.

"Neh, have you meet her then? You must meet her!!" He tugged excitedly at my sleeve, and I laughed.

"I have already meet her, Momiji. I went to their house just now." I pointed to the small "X" shaped bandage above my eye. "Honda-san had kindly helped me to bandage it." I explained.

"Areh, Yuri-chan, what happened?" Beautiful brown eyes went as big as sauce pans as he stared at me.

"I knocked myself, that's all. Nothing serious." I said jokingly.

"...Sou…"

A low rumble, similar to the one Shigure made but considerably louder filled the room. I slowly look at my stomach, before grinning sheepishly at Momiji. It was way past my usual dinner time.

"Saa, you haven't eat yet?? Never mind," he pulled me by the arm up. "I know a good café where it serves the best lunch!! Come on!!" He slide the doors open again, pulling me behind. I felt my pockets for my purse.

"Haru-kun!!" I heard Momiji shouted. Looking up, I came face to face with the solemn ex-boyfriend of Rin. He showed no expression at seeing me. Weirdly, Haru was the one of the few who tell us apart by just a glance. It began a few years ago, when I came back from the summer holidays like today.

"Haru-kun, have you eaten lunch yet??" Momiji, still holding my arm asks. Haru looks at him a moment before answering.

"Ie." He said dully.

"Honto ni?? Saa, let's go to lunch then!!" With his free hand, he dragged Haru with him down the corridor.

"Ii deska?" I asked the expressionless Haru beside me. He grunted something in reply, not looking at me. I secretly wondered if he was mad at me, like Rin as the walls rushed past us.

* * *

"Tsugoi te!!" Exclaimed Momiji, licking the Pistachio flavour ice cream in his hand. 

My fork dug into the spaghetti in front of me. Not bad, I thought as I chewed. Opposite, Haru took a bite from his burger he ordered.

The café Momiji took us was not far away from the Sohma Main House, just a few blocks away. A sign above it said, "Jazz Café". The walls were painted bright orange, with rounded yellow tables and red plastic chairs to match. Just as the name of the café suggested, jazz music sounded in the background.

I twisted my fork and ate the rolled spaghetti. The sauce got on to the side of my mouth, which Momiji pointed, laughing all the while.

"Yuri-chan, you eat like a baby!!" he cried. I hurriedly wiped it off with the paper napkin.

Haru watched it all silently, never joining in.

I tried to start a conversation with him. But being the poor communist, it didn't go so well.

"Haru, you just started 1st year in secondary school right?"

"Hm."

"Kagura said that you go to the same school with Yuki?"

"Hm."

"Did the Headmaster ask you why your hair is like that?"

"No."

"Oh." Slightly taken back, I kept quiet for a moment. "Did he ask you to change it then?"

"No."

"Do you still like playing football?"

"No." The last of the spaghetti vanished from my plate. Momiji was still licking his ice cream, looking at a family on a nearby table. I wiped my mouth on the napkin.

"Did you meet with any troubles at school with that hair?"

"……." A finger came up to his ear, and he twisted it rythmaticly. The burger was still in his hand, and I found that he had only eaten a few bites.

"You're such a nosey person."

My hand froze on the dirty napkin on the table.

"…Eh?" I asked, praying that his would-be reaction was just my imagination.

"...You ask too much questions. It's so troublesome to answer them all." The hand twisted one final round before it came out. "Why do you care so much about me anyway?" His head lifted; the look in his eyes chilled my blood. The gentle and soft-spoken Haru was gone, replaced by the wild, vicious look on his face.

"You care so much for strangers; more than your own sister. Why don't you stop poking your nose into other people's business and pay more attention to your own people??" The burger fell onto the floor; the plastic chair scraped the floor as Black Haru stood up, his hands on either side of the table. Momiji was staring at us stricken-faced, his ice cream forgotten.

"You left her when she needed you most." His voice deepened and got considerably louder as he raged on. "You ran into hiding at that stupid boarding school, when at here she was being _kicked_ out of her own home by her parents. And still you have the nerve to act concern about me??"

I gripped the sides of my plastic chair; wide eyes fixed at his every movement. The impact of the words gradually sank in, and the familiar feeling of worthlessness and embaressment mounted high, piling over each other and overwhelming me. Tears prickled at the edge of my vision; it was happening again.

First Rin, now Haru. Everybody is disgusted at my patheticness. I blinked and one tear slide down. Why was I so pathetic?

"Haru…" I heard Momiji tentatively asked. The surrounding was oddly quiet now; all the heads were focused on us.

"What? You're crying?" In the midst of my tears, I saw vaguely the figure of Haru leaving his place. A hand grabbed my chin roughly; I flinched and was thrust up to meet Black Haru's face. The whites were dominating his two eyeballs, the pupils almost shrink to small purple dots.

"Don't you dare cry in front of me." He whispered. "Don't you dare. You didn't know how bitterly she cried that day. She was being kicked out by her own parents, and where were you? Ten thousand miles away, probably gossiping about the newest idol with your bunch of friends!!" He shouted.

Ie…I wasn't like that at all…I silently protested. …I wasn't like that AT ALL—

The brisk click-clack of high heel boots on the smooth floor sounded beside me. Water splashed on the side of Haru's face; because of the how close our faces were, half of the water splashed onto my face too. I gasped at the sudden cold liquid on my face and felt Haru let go of me.

Panting slightly, I wiped the excess water off. When I looked up, Haru was remaining still, the water still dripping off the edge of his face in rivulets. His eyes had the look of absolute surprise. And beside us, with the empty glass in her hand…

I never thought I would see the same face twice that day.

* * *

Ie: no 

Tsugoi te: more or less means "This is incredible!"

Honto ni: really?

Ii deska?: Is this okay?

Tatami: a sort of mat that Japanese use to cover their floors


	9. Rin's burden Shell

Chapter 9 Rin's burden (Shell) 

Disclaimer: I do not own this song/fruit basket characters. The translation is done by Teresa Ko. ( I don't know her…)

a/n: I came across this song a while ago, and when I found the lyrics it seems to fit SO GOOD with Rin. Especially the part when "I vomited up my loneliness" and "for the sake whom I trust". This is the opening song of Witch Hunter Robin, Shell. ( I only put in the translation, so if you want the whole romanji lyrics you can search for it at animelyrics.) And about the burger Haru was eating, let's pray it's fish/chicken/ham burger. shudders

(_It's like I'll disappear as soon as I close my eyes_

_I feel like I've turned into someone that even I don't recognize_)

I set the empty glass down on the table with a sharp "plonk!" I was aware that the whole café had gone silent even when I entered, and everyone was looking at us.

(_Sadly, I've become so small_)

"Calm yourself down, Haru." I said, my tone icy.

Haru stares at me for a while longer before he shakes his head, closing his eyes. When it opened it was the soft violet it used to be. Though I didn't show it on the outside, relief washed over me. I ignored Yuri's shocked expression. The water had splashed on her too, due that their faces was too close.

Finishing what I came to do, I left them and walked out of the café. Behind me I heard Haru giving chase. I sprinted after I got out of the café and down the pavement. I felt him behind, but not close. When I came to a fork, I took the left one and jumped into the bushes of the owner's garden. A dog, chained to it's kennel, started barking. The sound would attract the owners. Leaping over the low garden bush, I came to their street. Staying behind the cars, I slowly maneuvered my way out of Haru's sight.

(_I want to be rescued, but instead of sighing_

_I vomited up my loneliness, and just lay there, measuring it all up_)

I wanted to see him so much, I thought as I ducked, seeing him running past me. He did not pause. When he was gone, I stood up.

(_Amidst this drop of time gone dry_

_My heart is drowning and writhing_)

I missed him so much…I was panting a little and my legs felt a bit wobbly. My body hasn't recovered yet?

(_These lies that make me dizzy_

_I took them and tore them up_)

I took in deep breaths, trying without success to calm my breathing. It will be a while before it could get normal. My legs felt less wobbly now, and I walked, meaning to get out of here quickly.

(_And with that,_

_I became lost_

_In a world of thin darkness_.)

Yuri's face flashed back to me. What was Haru thinking?? Assaulting her in public?? How _dare_ he? It's not like he doesn't know about her history…I shook my head. …if I had been late, I don't know what would have happened…

(_For the sake of those whom I should trust_

_I chose to come here, a cage into which I've locked myself_)

…After years of not speaking, she comes back to see me…you're so stupid…why couldn't you have stayed in Hokkaido? She wouldn't have got mixed up in this thing…you're so stupid…and so brave…

(_and now,there's no escape._)

…it just makes me want to push you away even further…away from all this…

(_Deep inside my parched throat_

_Lies the reason for this growing impermanence_)

I have to find a way to break the curse. If not, Haru and Yuri will be mixed even deeper into this…

Shigure won't tell me…my eyes narrowed. Is it because I'm not persuasive enough? Should I be more daring next time? A mental picture of a scene in the movie I seen before formed in my mind: the girl was leaning close to the men, making seductive moves. I bit my lips. Is that what I should do? Be like the girl in the movie?

(_Scared of the approaching tomorrow_

_I cower and collapse_)

…as long as it will be enough to persuade Shigure to tell me, I will do it. Determination overcame disgust. I will do what is needed to find out. Even if it means selling out my body. My eyes hardened at that thought. Doubt still wavered at the corners of my mind, saying things like: are you sure? After you sell it, you will be dirty. No one will want you. Not even Haru.

The cold truth hit me hard. After I do it, Haru will not want me. Nobody will. I will dirty, tainted.

_Your darkness will taint him!! You will corrupt him!! _

_We don't need you anymore!!_

(_But it seeks me out and whispers to me_

_This voice of thin darkness_.)

Hai, even so, I will still do it. Tears formed at the corner of my eyes, and I bit my lips harder. Even if no one wants me, I will do it to free Haru. A tear trickled down my left cheek. If he's happy, then it will be enough by me.

(_Amidst this drop of time gone dry_

_My heart is drowning and writhing_)

I was breathing normally now. No time to lose. I brushed the tears away.

(_These lies that make me dizzy_

_I took them and tore them up_)

The next step, the Sohma House storehouse. That would risk a meeting with Akito himself, if I was unlucky. The storehouse must have some things inside which dates about the curse.

Coming to the end of the street, I looked around to go to the Sohma House. It should be around here…I took the right one down.

(_And with that, I became lost_

_In a world of thin darkness_.)

My first attempt at song fic. Like it? Hate it?


	10. Choice

  
Chapter 10 Choice 

After Rin went out, followed closely by Haru, there was a strong silence in the café. Only jazz spilled out from the speakers above. Faces cast glances at us, and a murmur rose up.

Momiji dropped his ice cream, which was dripping, and came over. My face was lowered, excess water still on my face. My face and throat burned; tears prickled at my eyes. Embaressment and sorrow didn't mix well.

Haru's word's was right. I hid like a coward in Hokkaido, and I didn't even wrote a letter back. I was silent, hiding far, far away from it all. I was pathetic, a coward. But I did not enjoy the life there at all.

Momiji's form shaded part of the glances from the people inside. A small hand rested on my shoulder, then his child-like voice sounded softly.

"Yuri-chan?"

The tears flowed and mixed with the water. I opened my mouth to answer him, but something similar to a croak came out. My throat was still burning and my voice wavered, almost intangible. Momiji's hand still rested on my shoulder. I raise my finger to brush away the tears and forced a smile.

"Let's go, Momiji." I whispered.

When I stood up, faces immediately turned to me. The murmur faltered a bit, and I saw a woman muttering to her husband behind her hand. The sound of my shoes hitting the floor seemed to make the loudest noise, apart from the jazz music. I scanned the faces briefly when I walked. Most of it wore an expression of curiosity. Others looked on with a blank, unfriendly face. After that, I stared straight ahead of me, trying not to look at those faces.

The journey home was accompanied by silence. Momiji had a sullen look on his face and he looked at the ground. Although my eyes was on the road, I felt like a dummy walking, a hand behind my back controlling my moves and speaking. The road was a hazy window I looked out from the inside, wallowing in the feelings of self-worth and patheticnes.

When we stepped inside the house, Momiji turned to me with a bright smile.

"Nee, Yuri-chan, I have to go for my violin lessons now. After that I will take you to a fair that only came yesterday. Okay? Nee, please say yes!!" He pleaded.

I smiled faintly.

"…I'm sorry, Momiji-kun, but I think I can't go with you today." The feelings in me were too hard to beat down, and even if I went, it will continue to haunt me. Momiji's face fell for a second, but lightened up instantly.

"Jaa, we'll go tomorrow then, neh?"

"…maybe."

"Saa, I have to go now or the teacher will scold me. Matta neh!!" he waved, but I only smiled in return. He bounded off in the direction of his room, and I was left alone in the grounds of the house. Turning around, slow and dead-like, I ambled towards my room.

_Crying? You're crying? Don't you dare cry in front of me. _

Just as the door slid shut, the tears that I so unwillingly want came out. I closed my hand over my mouth and buried myself into the futon. Even the act of covering myself under made me feel pathetic. It felt like hiding; hiding and crying from the world.

All the words I said about Akito…I didn't have the right to say that…when I was such a coward, hiding…

I stayed like that for the rest of the day—in the dark, wallowing in my self-created depths of self-pity and utter hopelessness.

* * *

What happened next day did not made my life in the dark room any happier. In fact, it made me even worse, conflicting between my purpose here and my own feelings. 

The evening after I declined Momiji's offer to the fair, Mother came in to my room. I was sleeping on my futon, my back to her and a crumpled tissue in my hand. I felt a hand shaking me gently. My eyes fluttered once, twice and I turned over, rubbing my eyes.

"Yuri…I don't know what you did this time…" she whispered softly, worry evident.

My stomach gave a sickening lurch at her words. A sort of rigidness went up to my head, and my eyes were clear and alert.

_You know the ending for naughty girls, don't you?_

"…what is it? I haven't done anything wrong?" Oh no…what did I do?? What have I done??

"Hatori-san wants to speak with you. He said he will be waiting at his room until you can come up and see him." Mother was frowning in worry.

"…Huh?" I remain in a blank state for a while.

"Hatori-san wants to see you." She repeated, the frown still on. I suppose she hasn't forgotten the last time I got summoned into Akito's room. Though this was Hatori-san…

"I'll go, Okasan." I said, throwing my covers back and getting up. She followed my movements and by her expression she was going to protest.

"It's okay." The same words uttered by her a few years ago, seem so long, bringing back blurry memories. When she said this to Rin then…she came back unharmed.

I wonder if it will work this time?

* * *

I came out of the storehouse sweating and tired. The whole afternoon and yesterday's work…only a small fraction cleared. 

The Sohma storehouse was…big.

My head spin with the lack of air inside and layers of dust in the cropped up room. Opening boxes and crates, searching through musty documents and files, all turned up to be futile. Not one mentioned the curse, or even a remote connection to it. My long black hair stuck to the side of my face along with the sweat and I tucked it behind my ear. Now, walking through the Sohma grounds, gladly breathing in the crisp fresh air and being cooled, I saw a black-haired figure turning around the corner.

Quickly, I turned back and ducked behind a wall. I peered out of the corner. Yuri looked at the spot which I presumed where I was before. I forgot that she lived here too. Her gaze turned and I laid myself flat against the wall.

The next time I peered, she was walking again, her back to me and shaking her head. She came up to a room and paused, announcing herself first. A while later a man in white overcoat slide open the door. Yuri bowed and Hatori stood aside to let her in. The door slide close, locking the two people inside in their own secret meeting.

The Sohma ground was silent, devoid of any people.

Quietly, I sprinted over the distance and arrived at his door. Masking my presence, I raised my knees and my hands on the floor beside, leaned and listened.

* * *

"I know why you came back here." 

"...I always come back for the summer holidays." I replied. If anyone observed me and Rin's relationship closely, it wasn't hard to figure it all out. But known to a Jyunishi, except Rin, could mean disaster. All he had to do was open his mouth to Akito, and the cycle will begin again.

Hatori gazes at me steadily a while. I did not meet his eye and kept quiet. The silence was unnerving; an ice wall separating each other from each's mind.

"…I know the reason why you quit the boarding school at Hokkaido."

I closed my eyes.

"Let me give you a piece of advice. Abandon your purpose here; it will all be fruitless." He said dully, both hands in his white overcoat's pocket.

My eyes opened and I realize I had stopped breathing. I exhaled a breath and sucked in. My fingers flexed beside me.

"…Will you tell Akito?" With or without the advice, this was the most important thing of all.

"That depends on your decision. As far as I'm concerned, Akito does not know anything of this." The answer came naturally, as if he had expected this all along.

This sounds like he's blackmailing me...the thought popped into my head automaticlly. Was Hatori-san this kind of person?

"My purpose here isn't even half-way through…how do you know it will not succeed?"

"I have seen enough to be able to predict it. Take my advice: it is hopeless. Outsiders simply cannot understand the world we Jyunishi's are in…or of the curse we have. Meddling will only bring unnecessary trouble."

Hatori's words were chillingly close to Akito's.

"…demo…if I go back—" my voice choked, and I swallowed before continuing. "If I go back, I will live the life of a coward." I blinked back my tears. "I don't want to live that way. I don't want to leave."

Unruffled by all this, he looked away. The only sound audible in the room was my sniffing.

"Sometimes…it is better to be a coward than to be a dead hero." I heard a sound and raised my head. I finally meet his eyes.

If what I felt was a prick of a needle, what I saw in his eyes was the pain of losing. Hope did not seem to exist in there. We were fighting a losing war, an endless cycle that we couldn't break. And the worse thing was that we knew it, and were not hoping anymore. Hope was simply an illusion of the mind. Looking into the only eye that was visible, it was proof of his words.

I couldn't bear to see anymore. I broke off and looked at the floor.

I heard the ruffling of fabric and Hatori sat down on his swiveling chair.

"You may go now."

I felt his eyes staring quietly as I bowed and left.

* * *

A/N: thinking of it now, this whole story is full of angst, maybe _too_ full of it, don't you think? it's just a thought...anyway, the end is coming for this story. i don't expect it to be more than 5 chapters. Thank you all for your support! 


	11. Decision

Chapter 11 Decision 

"Yuri-san?"

I jerked and at once stood up properly from my position on the school gate. Honda-san's looked at me questionably with Yuki and Kyo beside her.

"Honda-san! I heard from Kagura-ah!-How is Rin?? What happened at Shigure's house??" I bombarded the poor girl with questions urgently.

"Yuri-san…" Yuki's voice floated above softly. I turned to him pleadingly. Kyo scratched his head.

I followed them inside the school compound. We sat in a shady bench, and Honda-san answered all my questions truthfully. I was dimly aware of Yuki sitting calmly beside her and Kyo standing, still scratching his head.

After a moment of silence, I finally spoke.

"Sou….I'm such a useless sister." I smiled sadly, shaking my head ruefully. One hand came up to finger my hair, a habit I had when I didn't want people to see. I didn't want them to see the tears blurring my eyes now.

"…I'm such a useless sister…I wasn't there when it all started…and now I'm not even there when _this_ happened…" I laughed, and that made the tears gush down.

"This is so pathetic…hahahaha…"

Nobody said anything. Yuki was silent, turning his head away, his bangs covering his eyes. Honda-san stared straight ahead of her. I couldn't see what Kyo was doing, but his figure was still.

"…what's the use of crying now? If you want to be a good sister for once, then go and see her."

_Huh?_ I raised my head up to look at Kyo, who didn't look at me.

"…Kyo-kun…" Honda-san mumbled. Yuki did not move, but his slight turn of head suggested that he was listening as well.

"If you think you're pathetic, then do something about it. Don't just _sit_ there and whine and cry. That won't change anything at all." He said, his back to me.

"I know that." I cried, trying to defend myself. "I know that, but—" I waved my hands in utter hopelessness.

_My purpose here isn't even half-way through…how do you know it will not succeed?_

_I have seen enough to be able to predict it. Take my advice: it is hopeless._

_She was being kicked out by her own parents, and where were you?_

_Fuck off! Why should you have a second chance??_

Kyo moved as he turned his head partly to face me.

"…don't listen to what they say. Just tell them all to shut up."

I stared at him, open mouthed. So did Honda-san, who looked completely memerised.

_Just tell them all to shut up. _

Is it possible? To believe in myself?

"…Rin-san…is always pushing herslf…she is always acting strong…to protect others…" she paused, and she smiled softly. She beamed as she looked at me.

"I think…that is very brave of her."

I looked back blankly at her.

"Sou da ne," Yuki chipped in with his usually soft voice. His bangs lifted to reveal lavender eyes.

"Rin is like this…she has a bad mouth, so she will say a lot of cruel things in order to push people away…" His eyes lowered ever so slightly. "But she doesn't say words to protect herself…"

_Go back to your warm, loving family and go live your happy life. Leave mine fucking alone._

She was saying those…to _protect_ me?

Then it all dawned upon me. If Rin only said those words to protect me, then what she really wanted was to keep me away. From Akito. That means that I still had a chance.

But by getting close to Rin would mean…feeling Akito's wrath upon us.

_Just tell them all to shut up._

The wind blew my dark hair across my face, my eyes wide and almost unbelieving.

_Shut up, Akito!_

Suddenly everything seemed to be alright. The sun never seemed brighter and warmer. I knew what I had to do.

I jumped up from the bench so quickly Honda-san was started and started to rise also.

"Arigatou, minna-san." I said to the surprised Honda-san, a slightly shocked Yuki and Kyo who huffed. I flashed a smile at them and ran down out of the school compound.

You can't push me away, Rin…you have to believe me…and in _yourself_…

* * *

I trailed behind Honda-san and the neko after Yuri-san's departure. Wind blew the leaves and my hair, while I was lost in thought. 

_If you think you're pathetic, then do something about it. Don't just sit there and whine and cry. That won't change anything at all._

Since when was he an expert in this? Did he knew what was patheticness? Did he felt it himself?

But in a way, he is right. It is no use sitting down there crying and blaming others for all the bad things in your life. But other than that, what could you do? Memories of staying in a dark room for ages, with no one to talk to, only loneliness whispering in your ear…and the feeling of worthlessness that wells up in you…

_Don't listen to what they say. Just tell them all to shut up._

I narrowed my eyes slightly. A rash way of handling things…the typical advice the baka neko would give…I wondered if I would have the will power to do that. Words are just as fatal as a sharp knife.

Oddly, I never thought of things in this way before. I snorted softly. What do you know, maybe the baka neko isn't as baka as he seems…

"Yuki-kun?" a sweet voice rang out, breaking my train of thoughts.

"Hai, Honda-san?"

"What are you thinking about?" I smiled at her innocence. How adorable.

"…it's nothing. I was just day dreaming." I said, glancing at the neko.

"What?" he said, catching my gaze.

"Nothing. Can't I look at somebody?" I shot back.

"Why you little—" he shouted, enraged.

Honda-san looked at us bewilderedly before smiling cheerfully.

It's a miracle that the baka neko's ass wasn't already kicked when we got home.


	12. Beyond the Door

Chapter 12 Beyond the Door 

_As if to confirm something, you tightly clench your right hand_

_If the rules are annoying you, just go ahead and break them_

_If you're thinking of resting your ailing legs_

_Move just one more step forward from here, instead_

_Even if we push our way through the distorted winds_

_Even if we outdistance the cold sky_

_Even then, we still continue to wander_

_The two of us are screaming all the time_

_Just continuing to believe isn't the answer_

_Expose your weaknesses and your wounds_

_If we don't continue to struggle, nothing will begin_

_So break through, beyond the door_

_Society has become entangled in complex problems_

_If reality is vexing you, just go ahead and blow it away_

_If you're planning on moping over abuse and slander_

_Let out your selfishness and desire, instead_

_Drown out the confusing noise_

_Shake free the gazes that have grown apathetic_

_Continue from here, on to the next stage_

_The two of us are searching all the time_

_This accelerated speed can never go back_

_Bind your strength and resolution together_

_If we don't continue to run, there is no future_

_So move foward, beyond the door_

_Even if the pride you hold over your head is a mistake_

_Even if the ideal you paint crumbles_

_Even if everything here turns to lies and wears you down_

_I'll definitely be here_

--Full Metal Alchemist (Tobira no mukou e)English translation by frong

* * *

I was in dark place. Light from above illuminated me from the rest of the shadows. 

I couldn't see beyond the circle of light. At far I thought I could see monstrous shapes forming. I stayed well inside the protective circle of light, confident that whatever out there will not catch me.

Wait. There was something. Listening intently, I tried to make out what it was.

…a sound…like a tune…

The lullaby! The one that she always sang to me…

Far off, I saw another beam of light. And inside the beam of light, was Yuri and Okasan and Otosan.

I wanted to go to them, but I was afraid to step out of my protective light. Afraid that whatever out there will get me when I ran.

Yuri's gaze was questioning; she looked confused. Okasan and Otosan's faces…instead of the always ready smile on their face…

…where they're faces had been, there was nothing but a blank mask. My stomach felt like a knot was forming in it, tightening and tightening. Fear rushed up to my throat.

I couldn't go out now. Okasan and Otosan are gone, but Yuri…I willed her to get out of there. She looked at me curiously, tipping her head sideways.

The light disappeared above me. I was clad in darkness. My stomach gave a lurch as I pondered on the sudden feeling of lossness. The only beam of light in that world of darkness was Yuri's.

I ran towards it. A hand descends on her shoulder and she looks up.

Behind me, the shapes are forming. They rushed towards me, their semi-liquid bodies giving a sickening whoosh, mouths open in endless cries of agony.

Running as fast as I could, I reached out a hand. Yuri saw and reached out one too, and it extended out beyond the beam of light.

Just a few inches more…

Okasan reached out a hand slapped Yuri's hand away; it fell back into the circle of light. One of the shapes behind me grabbed my ankle, liquid splashing over. I screamed.

* * *

With a sudden consciousness, I was whooshed back into reality. My heart beating fast and my breathing coming out in gasps, I turned over. 

My shaking hand came up to partly cover my eyes. The dream replayed again in my mind; I remembered the semi-liquid hand clutching my ankle; the fear and horror coming back in a rush. I felt sick and frightened all over.

Experience told me that sitting didn't help. Anywhere near here didn't help. I got up shakily and put on my jacket draped across the chair. Turning the cold steel knob, I peered out into the hallway. All was in shadows. The night-shift nurse behind the counter was dozing. I slipped put quietly and padded down the hallway.

* * *

The smell of antiseptics and medicines hit me as soon as I entered, along with the cold air-conditioned air. I _hated_ hospitals. So _white_ and dead. I shrugged and went to the counter. 

"Excuse me, I'm looking for a patient named Sohma Isuzu. Do you know--?" I didn't finish my sentence.

"Sohma Isuzu? Ah! That one!" she exclaimed. "The one who swung her drip stand at her visitor the other day! Bad temper, that one!" she giggled.

"Huh?" My mouth slightly gaping.

"She's in Room—oh, hi, Miyako-san! Could you come over here for a second! Never mind," she looked at me apologiclly and gestured to the nurse coming over. "She will take you to Sohma Isuzu."

"Miyako-san! Could you bring this young lady to Sohma-chan's rom, please? And let's hope she doesn't wack this girl with her drip stand too!" she chuckled.

"EH???" The nurse gapes at me, before pointing at me in horror. Perplexed, I blinked.

"HOW CAN IT BE!!?? I JUST RETURNED YOU TO YOUR ROOM A FEW MINUTES AGO!!" She practically screeched, and a nurse wheeling a old man in a wheelchair shot her a glare, which went unnoticed. "HOW DID YOU—"

"Ehh?" Now it was the woman behind the counter's turn to exclaim. "You mean _she_ is Sohma Isuzu??"

"HAI!! I SWEAR, I JUST SAW HER IN HER ROOM AND NOW—" She continued screeching like a banshee.

"Gotcha, Miyako-san!" She saluted and came out of her counter.

"In this hospital, young lady," she strode towards me, eyes flashing. "We abide by the rules very strictly. So if the doctor doesn't say you _may_ leave, then," she gripped my left arm in a death-lock. I frowned and opened my mouth to protest.

"Sumimasen, but I'm af—"

"—then you _may not_ leave." The nurse follows suit, and together they half-dragged me towards Rin's room.

"Now you had better not try to—" the door opened fully and the nurse froze so deathly still she could have turned ice. The receptionist's eyes nearly popped out of her head. The nurse looks at Rin by the bed, expressionless as she watched, back to me in her death-lock grip, and fainted.

The receptionist gaped at us, before reclining back from her death-lock grip so fast as if she was on fire. I gingerly massaged my arms.

"Anou…" her eyes darted to me and Rin. "Are you two.."

"Twins? Hai." I answered curtly, a false smile plastered on my face. "Domo arigatou, but could you…" I nodded towards the door.

The receptionist spluttered and managed to drag her unconcscious friend with her before I slammed the door. Sighing inwardly, I faced her.

"What are you doing here?" Relief flooded me when she didn't chase me out with her drip stand. Intense eyes regarded me coolly. After a while when I didn't answer her question, she broke off contact and looked out of the window. The slight breeze that blew in caressed her silky long hair.

"I suppose you want to know what happened. Forget it. You shouldn't have come anyway." I remember reading once in a diet book, that you should be firm to your decision. Don't make half-hearted statements like "I shouldn't" or "I can't".

A good sign?

"Honda-san told me everything." I said slowly, with no reaction from her, I continued.

"You can't keep pushing yourself, Rin…it's not good for your body…" Oh great. What a _spectacular_ opening statement.

"I don't need anyone to tell me how to handle my body. It's _my_ body; _I _choose how to take care of it." She retorted. "And I don't need you. Go away." She added rudely.

"Do you?" I asked casually.

She stilled momentarily, and when she glared at me I knew I was right.

"If you don't need me, then why do you try so hard to protect me?" Her eyes widened. Then it immediately narrowed in anger.

"Shut up. I don't need to hear you. Get out." She threatened, the walls around her building up again, cutting her off from everyone else.

"You shouldn't push people away. Even though you think it does them good, it actually doesn't. It only makes them hurt more."

"_Shut_ up. _Go away_."

"It isn't a crime to be weak. Everyone has a weakness of some sort. Running away doesn't solve it."

"_Fuck_! I said _shut up_!" she hissed, eyes flashing dangerously.

"You have to face it, Rin."

"I said,_ shut up_!!"

She's still so stubborn.

"…Onegai, Rin, I _need_ you in my life."

After the last sentence, there was a silence in the room. Rin's face had a look of absolute shock in it, not expecting this.

"…Why do you need me?" she whispered so softly, I didn't hear it.

"Why do you need me?" she repeated. "You have Mother and Father who cares about you, a new life at Hokkaido. Why? _Why_??" She lowered her head, her long hair cascading down everywhere.

I stepped forward and stopped at her bed.

"Because you're my sister. I really can't do without a sister to protect and vice versa, right?" I smiled sadly, tears stinging at my eyes. I squatted down and came level with her face.

"You've done enough protecting already. It's my turn."

She shook her head, and her hair followed, swaying from side to side.

"Dame…you cannot protect me. Akito will not allow it. People will only get hurt."

"Rin…you have to believe in yourself. You have to believe in me. You_ have_ to have hope."

"…there is no hope, Yuri…there is no hope for all of us…" she shook her head sadly again.

"No. Rin, listen to me. You _have_ to have hope. Without it you will not free yourself and the others. Without it I cannot protect you, and you cannot protect anybody." I dare not touch her face, so I shook her shoulders gently, not used to intimacy.

"You are not alone, Rin. There will be a way to fight the curse. There _will_ be."

Slowly, my hands released her shoulders and wrapped around her in a loose embrace. Not used to intimacy, I tried to do the right thing without pushing her.

"You have to _believe_." I whispered.

For a moment when I got no reaction from her, I felt a feeling of loss.

Then, much to my relief, with a cry she hugged me tightly. Smiling, I responded and hugged her back.

* * *

It happened again. I pulled her thin frame against mine, hugging her tightly. 

Believe. Hope. I thought I would never hear those words again.

_Running as fast as I could, I reached out a hand. Yuri saw and reached out one too, and it extended out beyond the beam of light. _

_Just a few inches more…_

_Okasan reached out a hand slapped Yuri's hand away; it fell back into the circle of light. One of the shapes behind me grabbed my ankle, liquid splashing over. I screamed_.

"From now on, I'm protecting you. I won't let Akito hurt you or me." She suddenly said. I felt myself gently pushed back.

I stared at her little finger poised up quizzically, before staring at her.

"We won't give up on each other, neh?" she beamed. Her other hand reached and took up mine.

"It'll be our little _secret_." She smiled again, until her eyes almost closed.

_You have to believe._

I sniff softly, and took hers in mine.

"I won't."

* * *

The hospital hallway bustled with nurses wheeling patients in wheelchair, doctors rushed past so urgently it seems that if they suddenly slowed down they would trip right over their heels. Cool white walls framed everywhere he walked, just in contrast to the outside. 

But as he looked in through the small window, oblivious to the two occupants inside, he felt somewhat a warm feeling inside.

Turning away from the small window, he walked coolly down the hallway, ignoring the glances people gave his black and white hair.

* * *

A/N: okay, climax over now. Originally, this should be the end. But i still wanted to continue on Yuri n Rin's relationship. I wonder if anyone thinks this came to easily? Well anyway, Kyo's the wise one here for a change.


	13. Blessings or Curse?

Chapter 13 Blessing or Curse? 

One of the things down here was the summer holidays. It was unbearably hot. Yuri fanned herself with her hand, succeeding in nothing but making herself even hotter.

Lucky she was standing under a tree. She arched her neck to gaze upwards at the canopy of leaves, providing her some shade.

"This trip had better be good, or I'm leaving right away." A gruff voice said.

She whipped around and smiled at her identical twin.

"This is one of the bookshops I frequented. There is a lot of things on the occult; and curses are still curses, regardless of culture, so there's a chance that you will find something useful." She replied.

Her twin huffed and walked off. Yuri skipped to chase after her.

It was amazing how even though twins, but had different personalities and choice of clothing. She admired Rin's style of fashion that seem to center around black and tight fitting clothes. Along with her long black hair, it gave off a kind of striking beauty and sexiness. Today she was wearing a black mini skirt with a white spaghetti-strap, with black flat heeled shoes. She knew that she would never _dare_ where those kind of skin displaying clothes out in public. She herself wore a light brown sleeveless V-neck top and a black mini pleated skirt because of the heat.

At the familiar clanging of the bell above when they entered the shop, xxx-san lifted up her head and beamed.

"Welcome again, Sohma-chan." She said politely.

"Konnichiwa, Izumi-san." She replied, returning the favour.

She led Rin down to the back of the shop, at the shelf of books where she met first Honda-san. She looked higher a bit and found that the book she had helped Honda-san brought down was still there. She lifted a finger and brought the volume down, handing it to Rin.

"You can start there. There's a lot of books in here so you can come everyday and still find that you haven't pass by this or that book." She went to the opposite shelf and chose one.

"Then I have to hurry, I guess." She retorted and at once opened the volume, not before scanning the title. Soon they were absorbed in their own books and was silent.

"…Neh, Rin…" Yuri sighed as she snapped her book shut and returned it back. She gaze at the books arranged neatly on the shelf.

"Why do you think Akito controls the Jyunishis so much?"

"…No idea."

"Isn't the bond suppose to be a blessing, not a curse?"

Rin sighed softly and looked up from her book.

"Originally, you are right. A bond between people is something to cherish about. It is very delicate, like a piece of glass statue. But if the bonded feel that the bond is a burden and tiresome, then it will be a curse." She said shortly.

Yuri was thoughtful for a moment; and Rin watched her expression.

"It isn't easy for outsiders to understand this. It's a very delicate and complicated thing." She finally said.

_Outsiders simply cannot understand the world we Jyunishi's are in…or of the curse we have. Meddling will only bring unnecessary trouble._

"…I know that."

"What?"

"Somebody…told me the same thing."

It was a while before the Rin knew what she was saying.

"What is your answer to him?" she said, looking unconcerned and returning to her book.

"Huh?"

"How did you know that?" Yuri asked suspiciously.

"What is your answer to him?" Rin repeated.

* * *

"You look different." The doctor commented as he closed he closed the doors and stuffed his hands into his coat pockets. 

She started and looked at him.

"How so?" she asked curiously.

"…you seem…" he paused, as if looking for the right description."... more energetic. Not as if you were going to burst into tears any minute."

Yuri smiled lightly.

"I've decided. I'm not going back to Hokkaido." She said, figuring that this was the main reason she was summoned.

After a moment of tense silence from the dragon, he let out something close to a sigh.

"Something happened. That's why you look different today. I assume that you know the consequences of your decision?" he said melancholy.

"I do."

"What about Akito?"

"What you want to tell Akito I cannot stop. But I will _not_ be leaving here." She said firmly.

"Why? You have nothing to lose over there at Hokkaido. A new life, new environment…" His voice trailed off.

"That is not true. I _do_ have something to lose." She corrected him. The doctor's silence prompted her to continue her words, which she did with a deep breath.

"I do have something to lose. I will lose myself, my sister, and the will of believing in myself." She continued.

"Hatori-san…" she cringed inwardly when she said that, because she wasn't used to calling him by the first name but they were still of the same clan, so she did not see the need to call him by his last name.

"You cannot lose hope. Once lost, there will be no way to fight the curse. As long as there is hope, the curse will be broken one day."

A horrible silence ensured in the room. If it wasn't for she was used to Rin's long period of silence and sudden outburst, she would be fidgeting nervously now.

"You may go now." She looked at the doctor, wanting to see if her words had any effect. The doctor's face was a cold mask as usual, but she thought she thought something flickered in his eyes. Only for a brief moment, because the next second it looked as if it was never there at all.

It must have been a trick of light.

But…she secretly hoped it wasn't.

* * *

"Did you find anything useful?" Yuri asked as they walked out of the shop, clutching a bag with some books she just bought. 

"A few. There was some Erupoean sort of spells that looked interesting, so I bought them down." Rin said, walking so fast that her hair blew up behind her aura-like. Yuri wondered if she was in such a hurry all the time.

"Where to now?" she asked.

"I'm going to the Sohma Main House's storehouse."

"I'll go too."

"No. This will blow our cover if Akito sees us together. It's too dangerous." She said shortly.

"I am living there from the end of summer holidays. When summer is over, I might be going to the same school as yours as well."

"No. Either way, you are not coming to the storehouse." Her tone had a note of finality to it.

"Okay." She gave up convincing Rin. She could be so stubborn at times.

Rin looked as if she wanted to say something but was hestitant for some reasons.

"What did your parents say when you decided to come back here?" she said softly.

Yuri noted that she did not use the normal Okasan and Otosan in referring and her heart sank several inches.

"They didn't like it. They tried to talk me out of it but that didn't succeed so they gave up." She said gently, lighting skipping over the subject. Rin nodded and didn't say anything any more.

"How's Hatsuharu?" she said, changing the subject. Her mind recalled the café incident, which she pushed away. Damn, why didn't she think first before saying?

As expected, Rin glared at her and refused to say anything except to threaten her that if she mentioned him one more time she was going to end the relationship.

"Hai, hai." She sweated.

They walked down the street in silence, sticking close to the walls and trees that sometimes provided some shade from the scorching sun.

They passed by a fruit stall with a big umbrella by the road. Yuri was hot and thirsty for something cool. She mentioned Rin to the stall and ducked under the big umbrella in relief. Rin followed reluctantly, seemingly not bothered by the sun.

She looked at the cut fruits in small plastic bag arranged in a box. Her eye also caught the jars of colorful jelly in the corner.

She pointed at the jars of jelly.

"Neh, Rin, your favourite! Jellies!" she said excitedly. Rin frowned.

"I have to hurry back to the storehouse, you know." She said gruffly.

"Never mind, you can still have one before that! Which one do you want?" she examined the jars. Rin sighed and pointed to a purple-red jar. Yuri took it up along with a bright green jar of her choice and paid the man.

They walked down a bit to stop behind a tree. Yuri opened her jar immediately and scooped up a spoonful of the green jelly.

"Oishi!" she said softly.

Rin opened hers and ate a spoonful. The coolness of the jelly seeped into her mouth, to be transferred down her throat. It was a relief against the hotness.

Maybe it was because of the jelly, but as she dug in for the second bite, she suddenly thought of Honda Tohru.

"Yuri…you are sure Akito will not discover about us?" Even though she had agreed to the relationship, it sort of reminded her of her relationship with Haru. In the end, they still were found out.

"As long as we keep it a secret, I don't think anyone will find out." She said absentmindedly.

"You _think_?" she huffed, skeptical.

Yuri frowned. "We can't control the universe." She held up the half eaten jelly to Rin. "The jelly is nice, isn't it?"

Rin rolled her eyes. What an unreliable sister. But yes, the jelly was nice.

"Yuri…" she said again as she thought of something.

"Hm?"

"What happened that day, before you came and see me?"

"…Ah? I went to see Honda-san, of course. It seems that everyone goes to see her, neh?"

"What did you talk about?" she asked bluntly.

"Not much. She told me what happened. But I didn't expect that to come from Kyo."

"Kyo? What about him?" she asked, surprised.

"You know, that believe in yourself thingie." She said, and looked somewhat uncomfortable.

"What thingie? I don't know what you are talking about." Rin said impatiently.

Yuri sighed softly and closed her now empty jar.

"When I told him I was a useless sister, he said I had to do something about it or regret it for the rest of my life. He also said that if anyone tries to beat you down of the sort, then just tell them to shut up." She repeated the almost exact words. That was the sort of thing you could count on Yuri; she could repeated everything exact, no matter advertisement, bulletin, messages…as if you were actually listening to the real thing. And never lie.

Rin pondered this for a while, her spoon stuck in her jelly jar, forgotten.

"Neh, Rin…I have a thought." Yuri's voice floated to her.

"What thought?"

"It's about the Jyunishi and Akito. I was thinking—maybe if Akito wasn't so demented and control freak, then the bond might not turn into curse."

Rin snorted. "That's for sure." She said sarcastically.

Yuri chose to ignore that statement.

"See, being possessed by a zodiac animal spirit isn't exactly a blessing. Most of them face a lot of problems; both mental and physical." She looked at Rin carefully. "So when they are faced with those problems, they could have turned to their God, aka Akito, to be comforted in their problems." She cleared her throat.

"Even if Jyunishi's had problems outside, they could always retreat to the inner place, and using their bond with their God, probably seek some solace." She finished.

Rin stared at the ground..

"Yuri, you're too naïve. The bond isn't as simple as you think; it's much more complicated than that." She said, a solemn look on her face.

"Like I said, and so has Hatori—Outsiders simply cannot understand the world we are in."

Yuri sighed and lowered her head.

"It would have been better if it was so simple." She finally dug in to her jelly and scoop up a large purple piece.

"Demo, even so, you cannot keep pushing people away." Yuri said.

"That is because meddling people will only get hurt." She retorted.

"Even if they _do_ get hurt, you must believe that it is _they _who chose this path, and I think I'm old enough to take some responsibility."

Rin only snorted. She scooped up the last piece of jelly and closed the jar with the spoon inside and handed it to Yuri. It joined it's other partner in the plastic bag.

"To the storehouse."

"You've wasted enough of my time. We better get there quickly or I'll never agree to walk with you anymore."

"You won't? Well then, I suppose that I should ask a certain somebody to persuade you." She winked.

Rin started as she knew who her twin was talking about.

"Don't you dare." She growled fiercely. "If you _ever_ went to find Haru about me I will personally—" she stopped in mid-sentence and turned red.

"Aha, I did not say that!" Yuri silently giggled behind her hand.

"THAT'S IT! From now on, I am not going out with you anymore!!" she yelled and flounced off down the street, long black hair flying behind her.

Yuri managed to stop giggling and chase after her twin, the plastic bag bunching sideways as she ran to keep up.

"Rinn.... matte!!" she laughed as she ran.

* * *

Oishi: more or less means delicious. 

Demo: but

A/N: And so i changed my mind again. This fanfiction is going to continue, until i run out of ideas and stuff. Rejoice: YAY!!


	14. Bitter Reminiscent

a/n: hey guys, sorry for the late update.

The car engine made no sound as it raced on the leaves strewed road, stirring them high.

Light projected stray rays on the face of the ten year old girl leaning against the car window. Her identical twin sat on the opposite side, asleep. A man sat in the steering wheel, concentrating on the road while the curly haired woman beside him was also fast asleep.

The car rushed by the trees and shrubs beside them, making them look like a blur of green to Rin.

_Today is Akito-sama's birthday. All the Jyunishis are required to gather at the Sohma Main House. _

_Ah? Won't that ruin our picnic plan today?_

_It's okay; Akito-sama is the head of the Sohma family. We must respect him. Father and I will drop you off first, then we will wander off in the meantime, untill you've finish then we'll have our picnic. Okay?_

_Okay._

_What are we going to do in the meantime, Mother?_

_We'll find something, Yuri._

Akito-sama's birthday. Rin pondered on the thought that even her mother and father, who were older than Akito, were calling him –sama.

_Akito must be a very important person…_

"Isuzu-chan! I haven't seen you for quite some time." A young Shigure, in his teens remarked as Rin, dressed in a fancy dress with frills and all, looking petite with her long black hair was flanked in by her parents. He raised a hand to mention her over when her parents left.

"Neh, neh, Isuzu-chan, you're growing prettier every time I see you." Shigure grinning cheekily while running his hands down her smooth as silk hair. Ayame beside him laughed loudly. Hatori remained silent, staring at them.

"Shi-chan, why don't you give Isuzu-chan her present you bought her?" Ayame said.

"Present?" Rin asked, her eyes wide.

"Hai, your present." Shigure said, taking out a small box and handing it to her. It was pink, those kind of present boxes that came in two piece. Fascinated, she opened the cover and pulled out a necklace, attached to a small bell. It ringed as she held it up.

The bell was miniature and made of glass, attached to the silver string and ranged whenever she moved it.

"She's too touched, Shi-chan."

"No, no, she isn't. It's beautiful, isn't it?"

Rin nodded her head in agreement.

"Here," Shigure took the necklace from her hands and proceeded to wear it for her, with a snickering Ayame and stone-like Hatori looking on.

"Shigure, I never knew you were so romantic."

"That's because you're too full of yourself to notice anything else." Hatori state flatly.

A hurt look came over Ayame's face and his eyes went big and brimming with tears.

"Ha-chan, you're so mean! How could you say something like that!" he cried.

Hatori rolled his eyes. Rin giggled behind her hands.

"Hey, I've got an idea." Shigure suddenly said.

"What?"

"Why don't we call you Rin, Isuzu-chan? It means the sound of a ringing bell."

"Rin?"

"Not a bad name. Considering the ones you always gave to your ex-girlfriends."

"That's artistic! A writer like me should always have good imagination, don't you agree, Ha-chan?"

"Giving horrible nicknames to ex-girlfriends is _not_ imagination, Shigure. It's call back-stabbing your enemies."

"Well, they were the ones who cheated on me first! So it's equal that we should return the favour, no?"

Rin listened attentively, her finger occasionally touching the bell on her neck.

A maid stepped forward of them and announced formally, "All Jyunishi's are now to enter the banquet hall. Please proceed." Before walking away.

"Yare, yare, I suppose we should go now." Shigure got up and started towards the banquet hall.

"Come on, Rin-chan."

Rin looked around at Ayame and Hatori, who seemed to have no objection against the name. The glass bell rang as she straightened from the floor.

Walking along with the group, she was surprised to find another boy trudging after them. She stared at the white and black hair. He was a few years younger than herself.

When he caught her gaze, the boy scowled and lowered his head. He ran with all his might and overtook Hatori in front. Rin blinked.

"…Who is that?" she asked no one in particular.

"Oh…" Shigure raked a finger over his hair. "Sohma Hatsuharu. One of us, but gets angry very easily. He goes Black when he does that."

"Black?"

"Hm. Hatsuharu is White when is normal, and turns Black when he is in a rage. Usually when he is White, his personality is very different from his Black personality."

Rin stared after the boy, thinking.

…

Rin patted her stomach, satisfied as she leaned back in her elegant chair. She felt a burp coming and covered her mouth politely, just like her mother told her to.

That was nice…we only get to eat this once in a year, so I must treasure this, she thought.

Shigure was chatting with Ayame on her left; she didn't understand why they kept giggling and laughing, so she turned to her right. Ritsu's back was facing her as he (Shigure had told her in snickers one day that Ritsu was actually a boy, but for what reason he would dress up as a girl still remained a mystery to her.) talked to Momiji excitedly. She leaned out a bit farther to hear what they were saying and caught a glimpse of white hair.

How weird; to have white hair so young. Rin's coal-black hair fell in front of her as she leaned forward to see better. She saw that while the boy named Haru's hair was largely white, but there were a few streaks of black peeking out from his neck collar.

Haru was hunched over in his chair, his plate already clean and cutlery neatly laid on the plate. Wide and beautiful eyes were staring ahead, brooding. Rin thought that only adults had that kind of posture.

When the doors opened and they were let out, Rin let herself to be swept along by the crowd and stuck closely behind Shigure. She turned and craned her neck to the impossible in order to see Haru above the sea of heads. Her efforts were futile, and she heard a tendon cracked in her neck. She stopped looking and massaged her neck while walking.

Now that the banquet was over, they could go home. Her parents and Yuri were not in sight. Only a few had came on time to pick their children up. Rin joined the others in the yard and sat under a small tree for shade. Her eyes scanned the area; the boy Haru was not here. Perhaps he had went home. Rin thought that Haru looked either cold or angry all the time; that lead her to wonder what kind of people his family were and whether they were treating him bad.

All the Jyunishi seemed to be very suffering; but I'm not the same. Mother and father are good to me, and so is Yuri. I'm lucky.

She realized that it was suddenly very noisy. She looked up and saw that a crowd was around a hopping Momiji, who had somehow acquired a skipping rope. She watched him skip and hop in time to the swings, and thought it fun. She got up from her place and squeezed in beside Ritsu. She tugged the sleeve of his kimono.

"Where did Momiji get the skipping rope?"

"Eh? Oh, in the Sohma storehouse. There." Ritsu tore his eyes away from Momiji and pointed behind Rin.

She ran and found the storehouse. It was a separate build form the house, situated in the center of the yard. She went up the steps and push against the door. She struggled with it for some time before a maid crossed by and helped her.

The door opened to a wave of musty smell of rarely aired room. Rin peeked innocently at the insides; there was light from some window above, because she could see the boxes and crates clearly. Some boxes were stacked so high they reached the ceiling. The light shone and illuminated the specks of dust hanging in the air.

She entered and walked around. She found what she wanted and rushed out again, eager to try it out.

Outside the storehouse, she knocked straight into Hatsuharu.

She gasped slightly and felt Haru hold on to her elbows so that they both would not fall. When they were steady, Rin's eyes raised timidly. She saw his soft brown eyes looking, not at her, but at the roll of skipping rope in her hands. After a while, he let go of her elbows and retreated back.

He went and sat on the steps of house, brooding again. Having no idea what to do, and not to mention that the situation was quite uncomfortable (to her at least, because Hatsuharu did not seem to notice at all), she stood rooted for a moment. Then awakwardly, she unrolled the rope and began skipping. She missed the first few times, then gradually got into the rhythm and it was all smooth.

She didn't know when did Haru suddenly appeared, standing not far from her to be hurt by the swings, his hands tucked into his pockets and brown eyes placidly studying her. Startled, she lost her rhythm and her legs caught the swinging rope. She nearly tripped but recovered and got back on her feet just on time.

Flushed and embarressed, she thought about trying again. It was summer; her back was drenched in sweat. She turned her head slightly and saw Haru still watching her.

"You're not going to play anymore?" he asked.

"Eh?" She blinked, then said softly, "In a while. I want to rest first."

"Can I play?"

Rin stared at him, realizing what the question was, then handed him the skipping ropes. Haru took it and stepped into place, and began skipping. He immediately got it right the first time. Rin watched, mermeriszed by the expert moves. Haru did not seem distracted by anything at all; he just kept staring forward of him calmly.

Finally, he handed back the skipping ropes to her, and when he walked away, Rin saw that he was sweating as well. They were not exactly playing in a shade. She got into position and skipped. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Haru studying her again. She was so flustered she tripped again.

"You are not concentrating." He remarked softly. She dared not meet his eyes, but picked herself up and tried again.

Concentrate. Don't let yourself be distracted.

The rays of sun was blocked momentarily by the first swing of the rope. First swing, second swing….she was getting better. Then in the middle of it, her feet caught the rope and her rhythm broke, like a song ended abruptly. She glanced at Haru, who was as calm as ever. Except that he was walking towards her.

He picked up the rope and his stare hinted that he wanted to say something, but was waiting for her to stand up. She quickly did so.

"Don't get distracted. Be one with your rhythm and the ropes. You try." He said simply.

It wasn't easy. She tripped a few times more before Haru's words sink in, and she found herself almost as expert as Haru. She turned and smiled at him, succeeding in doing so without tripping in. She had wanted to say thank you, but instead said what she had been thinking all along.

"I like your hair." Haru's eyes widened into sauce pans in shock. Next she saw a blush appeared faintly on his cheeks. It was so cute she laughed.

"Rin!"

At the sound of her name, she stopped skipping and turned to see her mother waving at her. Time to go home.

Rin dropped the ropes and bounded to her mother, but remembered something. Haru was staring after her, and at eye contact, she waved goodbye to him.

"Ja ne, Hatsuharu-kun!" She beamed. Whether from shock or surprise he didn't wave, but the blush got deeper on his face. She laughed and waved for the last time.

…

Rin bounded down the stairs at the sound of the front door being opened, her heart pounding.

Yuri will be alright. Akito is a nice person. He will not hurt her, ne?

The atmosphere in the living room contrasted sharply against her self-assuring thoughts. Her mother was helping Yuri through the front door while her father opened it for them. Yuri's hair was covering her face. Rin froze on the stairs, suddenly feeling sick in the stomach.

This is a dream. It's not happening, is it? Even from the distance, Yuri's shoulders was shaking. At that moment, her mother noticed her presence and raised her head. Rin saw an unfamiliar expression on her face.

"You lying bitch." Her mother snarled.

…

The blow came unexpectedly. It made her ears ring as she fell to the floor, dully recognizing the aching pain on her left cheek. Her hair came loose from behind her and draped around her face.

"BITCH! YOU FUCKING LITTLE BITCH!" She heard her mother scream. A hard kick struck home at her left side and she cried out.

It seems that her cry had triggered something in her mother, because next attack came from all directions. It was as if her mother was possessed by a demon, she wasn't aiming for a particular spot, just kicking everywhere and cussing as she did. Rin covered her head with her arms and silently accepted. No tears stung her eyes this time. Maybe she was used to it. Used to all the beatings.

A pause. Relief surged in her. Finally.

Unsatisfied by the silent acceptance, her mother grabbed Rin's head with a savage cry and rammed it into the wall. Once, twice.

There was pain. Then dizziness overcame her with the pain. Darkness blotted out her vision of her mother panting after the show of her strength, and the sight of her father leaning against the frame of her bedroom door, his face an expressionless mask.

It wasn't like this before. Before that…it wasn't like this before…

The memory of the incident played once again in her mind.

We are a happy family. We are happy.

_Rin, what kind of dressing do you want to go with your salad?_

Those were happy times. Mother and father and Yuri and me, living together, laughing…

_Of course we love you, Rin. We love you so much. _

It was just a show. You were all pretending.

_Mummy, why are we so happy? Don't we get sad at all?_

The bowl of salad dropped from mother's hands. Father stopped reading his newspaper. The show ended.

_What…Happy? You call this happy? We were all working so hard…Fuck off!_

Darkness blotted out everything.

…

The car skidded to a stop outside their house. Yuri was oblivious to it all. She only registered it when her mother gently mumbled something incomprehensible and led her out of the car. Her legs swung over the car into the ground, but she was so weak she could hardly stand. She raised her head and saw her father rushing up the steps to open the front door made of solid wood. Her mother had got out of the car and seeing her hobbling unsteadily on her feet, at once came to her side.

When she entered the house, she felt an immense relief. Relief that she was at last home.

Far away from him. But not far enough. She was still in the Sohma Main House.

Then she heard a snarl that reminded her of an animal. Her eyes lifted to her mother, then to who her mother was looking at. Rin stood with a mixture of expression on her face: shock, guilt and hurt. She saw all of the emotions flew across Rin's face the moment their eyes locked. As much as Rin was her twin sister, she felt inclined to point a finger at her.

It was you. You lied. You're the one who caused me this.

But her current state prevented her from doing so. Her head dropped and caused her raven black hair to fall around her. Memory of the previous encounter with Akito flashed into her mind again.

_You'll be a good girl for once, won't you? You'll be a good girl and stop meddling in my business, won't you?_

Stay away from Rin. Whatever you do, just stay away from her, and then things will be okay. That's what Akito said.

Yuri was led into a room to have her wounds tended. Under the soft touches of her mother, she was lulled into sleep on the warm and soft pillows of her bed.

…

Rin woke up groggily. Her eyes fluttered and closed, and she thought she was going to sleep again, but she couldn't. Her eyes fluttered once more, and they opened an inch.

Her head felt like a hammer was hammering into it.

She slowly moved in her position on the floor. She tried to hear for any noise in the room to signal another presence. Nothing. Her legs moved and her shoulders flexed, sitting up. Her head pounded loudly because of the blood flowing down and she only heard the sound of her heart beating inside.

She felt something trickle on her forehead and touched it. Crimson liquid coated her fingers. Her mother had indeed literally rammed her into the wall. Trickles of blood was now flowing down the side of her head, some coming close to her vision. She wiped it off.

What kind of mother would do this to her own child? Rin wondered not for the last time. Unless she was not her child, of course. What happened to that warm and caring mother she had known?

It was an act. They were all acting around you.

I know. I know it was an act. Can't we all go back to that act? Can't we_ all_ go back?

Rin heard a sound behind her. She wheeled around and came face to face with her father.

…

Ja ne: Bye/see you later


End file.
